Can You Really Have an Orgasmic Birth? (2024)

Think for a moment about all the ways you've heard childbirth described. "Orgasmic" probably isn't at the top of the list, if it's even on the list at all. And yet, a movement directly focused on having orgasms while giving birth does indeed exist.

But can birth really be orgasmic? And perhaps more importantly, how does one achieve it?

According to some experts, the answers to these questions may lie less in focusing on the almighty climax and more in the way you approach the process of labor and delivery. Here's what you need to know about orgasmic birth.

Can You Really Have an Orgasmic Birth? (1)

What Is Orgasmic Birth?

Orgasmic birth is about the connection between birth and sexuality, says birth and postpartum doula trainer, childbirth educator, and founder of Orgasmic Birth, Debra Pascali-Bonaro. Pascali-Bonaro wants to make it clear, though, that the idea of achieving orgasm during birth is not about placing a new performance pressure on people giving birth (they have enough of that already, she notes). Rather, it's about challenging one's current belief system related to birth and being open to the idea that birth is, in fact, "a sexual act."

What Pascali-Bonaro is referencing is the fact that during labor and delivery, the baby is moving through the same body parts involved with sexual pleasure. The baby is opening the cervix, moving into the vagina, and potentially touching the G-spot (an erogenous area located on the anterior or front of the vaginal wall).

As such, she believes that educating people on the possibility of sexual pleasure during labor and delivery allows more people to view their births as joyful experiences. She believes a shift in mindset may even help to decrease the need for medical interventions to manage labor pain.

Can Having Sex During Pregnancy Actually Induce Labor?

Does Orgasmic Birth Work?

From a medical perspective, Alyse Kelly-Jones, MD, an OB-GYN based in Charlotte, North Carolina, finds the concept of orgasmic birth "fascinating." Though she says in the 20 years she's been practicing, she's never seen it happen (that she knows of).

She believes it's plausible that someone could experience orgasm during delivery. Still, she notes that since everyone experiences orgasm differently and everyone experiences childbirth differently, she believes achieving orgasm during delivery would largely depend on the type of orgasm someone can achieve when not in labor. In other words, how much clitoral stimulation is needed to climax?

Other potential barriers to sexual expression during birth might include:

  • Cultural beliefs about sexuality
  • Access to privacy and intimacy
  • How involved partners are in the birthing experience

However, when it comes to using masturbation or partner-assisted intimacy as a means to manage pain during labor, Dr. Kelly-Jones says she is "totally curious" and would love to explore the idea further in her own research. She points to the fact that oxytocin, the hormone released during labor that makes the uterus contract, is also the same hormone released during orgasm.

Researchers have found that oxytocin improves mood, decreases anxiety, and mitigates stress. Evidence suggests it can also affect how you experience pain.

How Can Interventions Interfere With Orgasmic Birth?

The relationship between the hormones produced during both labor and orgasm is what Pascali-Bonaro feels has largely been ignored because of the over-medicalized nature of birth in the US. She admits it's been challenging to gain the support of the medical community in the past—publicly at least.

When she released her groundbreaking documentary, Orgasmic Birth: The Best Kept Secret, in 2008, she received calls from medical professionals who would tell her how much they enjoyed the film but that they couldn't come out and support birth and sexuality publicly.

"If our own caregivers can't honor the sexuality of birth, we're in trouble," says Pascali-Bonaro. She also notes that in other parts of the world, she's experienced more openness to the concept of birth and sexuality (though the US isn't the only place she's faced challenges in spreading the movement).

Still, she wholeheartedly believes that by using natural hormones and our own bodies' resources during labor, there is a stronger likelihood of better outcomes in birth. She acknowledges the need for medical intervention in some cases but stresses that overuse has not improved birth outcomes in the US.

In fact, research has found that overuse of childbirth interventions can increase the risk of:

  • Perineal trauma
  • Birth complications
  • Uterine rupture
  • More difficult recovery

Plus, Pascali-Bonaro argues that US outcomes are getting worse. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), maternal mortality in the US is steadily increasing. In 2021 there were 39.2 deaths per 100,000 live births, up from 23.8 in 2020 and 20.1 in 2019.

Another thing that can impede an orgasmic birth is a lack of support or outright hostility. According to a study, one in six people reported mistreatment during childbirth in the US.

Pascali-Bonaro says that science shows that the less we disturb natural hormones, the safer and healthier labor is in the short- and long-term.

Is Sex During Pregnancy Safe?

How Can You Achieve Orgasmic Birth?

When it comes to actually experiencing an orgasmic birth, Pascali-Bonaro says the key step is to be mindful of where and with whom you're laboring and birthing.

Environment

"Even though it sounds cliché, you should have the same kind of environment where you can have a nice, comfortable sexual experience," says Pascali-Bonaro. In other words, aim to labor in an environment where you have privacy and feel safe among the people present.

Whether or not that includes a hospital setting will largely depend on the individual hospital, as well as your comfort level and support system. But if you do plan on giving birth in a hospital or birthing center, one way to do this could be to request a private room and bring items that set the mood. Think: Dimmed lights, fairy lights or flameless candles, and music. You can also request that only essential hospital staff be present to limit the number of people in and out of your room. Use your birth plan to communicate your preferences.

Massage

And if you're not quite ready to commit to trying to climax in the birthing room? Massage is another way in which pleasurable sensations can help manage pain during labor. Research has found that back massage in the first stage of labor effectively reduces pain.

Touch conveys reassurance, caring, and understanding—whether it's someone holding your hand, stroking your cheek or hair, or patting your hand or shoulder. Have your partner or doula massage you with light or firm strokes using oil or lotion to help soothe you.

You could also place three tennis balls in a tube sock and have your partner roll them up and down your back to relieve back pain. Or have them rub your back with the heels of their hands.

Key Takeaways

Whether you believe you can achieve an orgasmic birth or not, Dr. Kelly-Jones says she can't think of a downside in attempting pleasure as a means of managing pain during childbirth. "Think about it," she says. "When you have an orgasm, kind of nothing gets in the way of that…and for a good while after, you're feeling euphoria. I'd love to see that happen in labor."

Can You Really Have an Orgasmic Birth? (2024)

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